What To Do When You Compare Yourself To Others
Have you ever caught yourself comparing yourself against others? They might have better skin, nicer clothing, more attractive facial characteristics, more money, etc. Or perhaps they are simply better at one thing than you, like playing the piano. Your brain begins to convince you that you are inferior as soon as you become aware of these distinctions.
Nevertheless, do you really?
Humans naturally compare things to one another. In terms of appearance, income, professional achievement, relationships, and other facets of life, we frequently contrast ourselves with others. While comparing ourselves to others is common, doing so can also lead to tension, worry, and even melancholy. When we judge ourselves against others, we may experience feelings of inadequacy, envy, and frustration.
Your mental health and general well-being might suffer significantly when you compare yourself to other people. The following are some ways that comparison might be detrimental:
Negative self-talk might result from comparisons to others and the belief that we fall short of their standards. Our self-esteem and confidence may suffer if we are too hard on ourselves and concentrate on the perceived defects and deficiencies in ourselves.
Causes feelings of inadequacy: Comparing ourselves to others can make us feel inadequate, which can result in low self-worth and feelings of inadequacy. Stress, worry, and even despair may result from this.
Comparing ourselves to people who we believe to have greater success, fortune, or happiness than we have can result in sentiments of jealously and anger. These unfavorable feelings can harm connections and prevent us from experiencing happiness and contentment in our own lives.
Comparing can lead to a false perception of who we are and what we have accomplished. We might simply consider our shortcomings and contrast ourselves with those who aren't truly representative of our own potential and ability.
Personal progress is hampered by comparison since it might leave us feeling defeated and uninspired to work toward our own objectives. This may limit our capacity for personal development and complete potential.
Can result in physical health difficulties including headaches, stomach problems, and insomnia. Comparing can also lead to stress, which can result in physical health issues like these.
What then should you do if you see yourself comparing yourself to others? Here are some approaches that could be helpful:
Acknowledge the natural tendency towards comparison
Recognizing that comparison is a problem and that it is a natural human propensity is the first step in solving the problem. To some degree, everyone evaluates themselves against others. We try to use the facts we learn about others' lives to help us feel better or worse about our own circumstances. Knowing that comparison is a normal propensity will allow you to start addressing it without feeling guilty or ashamed.
Consider your own development.
Focusing on your own development rather than other people's accomplishments will help you avoid comparison. Try to concentrate on your own accomplishments and the progress you've made in your own life rather than feeling jealous when you see someone else succeeding. No matter how minor they may seem, acknowledge and celebrate your own accomplishments. For instance, if you're comparing your employment success to that of a friend, concentrate on your own accomplishments rather than feeling jealous of their well-paying position or fancy title. Have you lately been promoted? Have you succeeded in finishing a challenging project? Have your supervisor or coworkers given you any flattering comments? Focusing on these accomplishments can make you feel better about your own position because they are all achievements that deserve to be celebrated.
Making an effort to be grateful is another strategy to avoid comparison. Spend some time each day thinking about the blessings in your own life. You'll be less inclined to feel envious of others if you concentrate on the positive aspects of your life. Take a few minutes each morning or night to jot down three things for which you are grateful. They could include more meaningful things like the affection and support of your family and friends, or simpler pleasures like a warm bed, a lovely sunset, or a good cup of coffee. By focusing on the good things in your life, you can teach your mind to ignore the bad, which can help you fight feelings of jealousy and inadequacy.
Don't spend too much time on social media.
Social media is a comparison breeding ground. It's simple to become ensnared in a world of carefully chosen pictures and status updates that give the impression that everyone else is leading a more interesting, prosperous, and fulfilled life than you are. If you discover that social media is causing you stress, you might choose to minimize your usage. Consider completely stopping using social media or only using it during certain hours. If you do use social media, make an effort to be selective about the accounts you follow. Focus on accounts that inspire and drive you rather than ones that make you feel inadequate or envy. Consider muting or unfollowing as further options.
Be surrounded by encouraging individuals.
When trying to avoid comparison, having a strong support system of friends and family can really help. Instead of being around people who will make you feel inadequate or envious, choose friends and associates who will encourage and support you in achieving your goals. Try to restrict your exposure to certain acquaintances or partners if you discover that they make you feel bad about comparisons. Instead, put your attention on spending time with those who who make you feel good about yourself.
It can be challenging to stop comparing yourself to other people, but it's important to understand that it's a normal human propensity. You may take action to combat comparison and lead a more complete, gratifying life by admitting the issue, concentrating on your own accomplishments, cultivating appreciation, limiting your use of social media, and surrounding yourself with encouraging people. Each has a unique journey, therefore it's vital to keep in mind that what works for one person might not work for another.
In short, the only person you can realistically compare yourself with is you. No one else! A secure person decides on the rules for how to live their life. You can pick the standards and norms by which to measure yourself, rather than use those given to you by other people. So, if you were to measure yourself by your own rules, what would your life look like? What would your goals be? What parts of yourself would you start loving instead of hating?
While you struggle to resist the impulse to compare, be patient and gentle to yourself. You can learn to appreciate your own particular journey and experience more joy and fulfillment in your life by concentrating on your own advancement and the things you're grateful for.
Yours truly,
Michelle & Co.
